Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Chic accessories for Gardens & Terraces to chill in.


have been home shopping to a local store called Galerías el Triunfo. In this shop you can find any kind of accessories and furnitures for the house; some of them are a bit pricey for my taste; however if you know how to look, you can find some pretty good bargains on knick knacks. 

Here are some of the items that are on my wishlist. Though I am guilty of having bought some already. :D

Mainly I have focused on the garden. On alternative, chic, interesting pots; some other cool stuff for the kitchen and finally my very desired boho chair! (Oh some sweet day...!) 




Pictures from my iphone from Galerías el Triunfo.

Other images:
gartenzauber.com
brit.co
maison-deco.com
myparadissi.com
westelm.com
Vogue Mexico.

Monday, 11 May 2015

Incredible Vintage Wardrobes.


Soon I shall have my own!

I have designed it myself inspired in the following pictures and in a couple of days it should be ready. I am really looking forward!! A double door grey - cream  vintage / shabby wardrobe with storage room on top and bottom so little G and I can share it.

Once I get it, I'll take photos of it, specially so I can share with you the new style of the bedroom. I have half painted the walls in what it was suppoused to be a green - mint but it turned out to be darker than I hoped.  

Green is to be a partial colour for a crazy beautiful boy and myself (that is until we can get the extension done). 



Images found on:
say-say-say1.blogspot.com
frenchinspiredliving.wordpress.com
lady-gray-dreams.tumblr.com




Monday, 4 May 2015

Single Living week 7: The last one of these series: Making projects for a sweeter future :)

Projects, projects, projects...

For a better & brighter future  :)



Declutter the space, don't become a hoarder. That is a nasty habit. Keep essentials, throw away the mess and give what you don't need to who may need it. Frankly, we do not need much. Living simply is a good way of living. Allows you to be creative and to breath goodness in to your home.

Look after the garden! It is your ZEN zone. 

Remind yourself to maintain order, put things away properly and keep an efficient organising system. They are all great habits to pass on to the little one. 




Work on a realistic project to maintain a cupboard stacked with goodies. Learn to cook easy but healthy meals, preferably from the organic market. Buy key plants to grow on your own allotment; keeping them nice and tidy and don't forget about them!
Follow a workout routine to stay healthy and dedicate time to spiritual growth. Meditation, mantras and a positive mind are essentials. Being strong and fit are as important as to learn to listen to your body so it can feel and flow with natural grace. 




Browse for ideas, search what is happening out there: Research with different topics on mind: recreation, education, workshops, day trips, picnics... 

Try to think for what would have been / was meaningful to you as a kid. You are building the future substantial memories of your little one.  Be silly and kind. Enjoy every minute of it. Time passes rather quickly.





Listen to your heart, learn the important lessons in life, go with the flow, relax, trust in the cosmic energy, destroy your ego, be your authentic self and don't apologise for being you.


Images:
buzzfeed.com
Thedaybookblog.com / Chandler Smith Photography
Yoga-life.com.au
myparadissi.com




Sunday, 26 April 2015

Single living week 6: Important lessons to keep in mind.

It has been a bit hectic: with all the admin work that I had to do for work and personal stuff I was feeling exhausted by wednesday! So much that I got my usual fatigue migraine and then.. agh.. a horrible anxiety - panic attack at work. I thought I had overdose on pain killers. It was embarrassing enough that nurses had to come and help causing concern amongst other teachers and students.  

Unfortunately.. it was a bit of a show, followed by the repetitive "how are you feeling today?" the next day. I do not like to get that kind of attention, but I guess I need to ease off. People are genuinely concern about my health and I should admit when I need help. There is nothing wrong with that. 


***

Anyway... week by week I slowly realise that this is all a process for the better, for everybody involved, well at least, for little G and myself.  It may not seem like great times at the mo but in the long run it is what I would have preferred for us. Concentrating in what  beautiful gift is the present.  

I am not resentful against my ex. It isn't really him, it's his illness that is taking control over him and there is nothing I can do about it other than to live life as fully as possible (yolo.. right?).

So I am taking notice of the little things that make life a nice treat...



What I want out of life for my little one and myself is a summit of spiritual and meaningful experiences and they can not come right next to the most vain, selfish and arrogant person I have ever had the inconvenience of being with (result of what he is going through). That path, I know leads no - where we want to be in.  

My son is a great, gorgeous, happy little boy who deserves and needs a loving family unit. 


With that in mind, I have to give myself a pat in the back to have had the courage to come out of a destructive and violent environment. A decision that not many women take. It is a road to the unknown but I rather that then sticking to what I know it simply doesn't go. 

I know it may sound like I am incredibly brave, but truth to be told I need a lot of work to heal, to re - find myself and more importantly to learn the many lessons I have at hand. These ones being:




1) You can't force anything. Things are forever changing and I have to really learn how to go with the flow (my biggest challenge).  If you resist, you suffer. 

Going with the flow means acceptance. And more importantly is learning how to respond to life rather than reacting to it. 

2) If you don't love yourself. You can't love no - one else. 

Love and everything that goes around you is a result not of outside circumstances but a mirror to what lives deep in your soul. If you correct what lives in your spirit, everything else falls in to the right place. 

3) The mexican expression: "Tell me what you brag about, and I'll tell you what you lack of".

Beauty is subjective and is a reflection of what lives in your soul. It reflects into others when is in harmony with the universe. 

Looks always fade away, so is always wiser to invest in your spirit rather than this egotistic culture of self image. A pretty face can be nice to look at but when is a shallow one, all magic disappears rather quickly. It's naturally a process; feed yourself with junk food and sooner rather than later you will look unwell. You are what you eat and you become what you think. So feed your soul wisely. 

What is, it simply is, there is no need for branding nor promoting. You don't need to tag every flower nor every sunrise with qualities that are obvious to the eye. If you must so, then you are probably thirsty of the same adjective you so desperately want to name yourself by. 

4) Don't take bullsh*t. Throw it to the bin. Learn to listen to your heart and learn how to distinguish between what is pure and what is a product of the ego either your own, or someone else's. 

So many people are so desperate to spill their own insecurities, fears and weaknesses that want to interfere with your own life. Ignoring it, is the best way to go. Now, when this happens, don't blame nor point fingers at others (or yourself). It is a bi - product of our current lifestyle (the overall way of life, that is). 



***




So basically, find beauty in chaos, don't hold into anything, be in touch with your soul, let go of the ego path, become aware of your own thought process and your own response to life. Don't let yourself get caught on reacting to it. Stay close to like minded people and shine my darling, shine! 

I am incredibly thankful for all the wonderful people in my life. I am truly blessed. 

Sunday's Farmer's Markets: Children's day!

Note about violence:

You may have heard about it, but like me, you never realised it was happening to you. If you are suffering from it, cut loose! Get the protection you need and get informed. The only thing that may be holding you to (if you really think about it) is fear, and fear is a false state of mind. It is not real. Lives in your head only. Reality is what you make of it.
There are many types of violence: physical (quite obvious); emotional/ psychological (includes shouting, insulting, ridicule, threats, sulking, asking you to leave your family house, belittling, bullying and a big, big etcetera.) and patrimonial violence (when yourself or your children are depending on goods to survive and they are not provided). It is never OK. It brings incredible damage to your self - esteem and to your health. Myself I lost a lot of weight, suffered from anxiety and still have problems to sleep.
Get the help you need!!


Sunday, 19 April 2015

Single living week 5: Tying loose ends and looking forward to setting up new projects.

There are a lot of things people often say to the grieving and those words are all very appreciated and welcomed. From wishes of courage to all confidence and assertiveness that things will look brighter with time. Something like: for all this sh*t there will be its rewards. 

Yes, I do want to rebuild my life, of course. I still want a family that is loving, close, stable, healthy and willing to be there for each - other no matter what. I am an idealist maybe, but I have seen examples of such and I want that. A great partner and father to my beautiful son. Will it come with time? Who knows what the future will bring, but I will, for sure be smarter this time around!



For all the greatness and excitement that dating may bring I don't feel prepared. Not only cause it is too soon (I am aware of that) but there is one simple fact that was true and still remains: I don't like the hassle of dating.  

As I say to my friends.. can't my true love meet me while I am wearing pijamas and knock on my door?? Instead of being breaking your head with thoughts like: "Will he call?", "Does he like me?", "What does this thing he said/ did mean?"... Or simply playing dressing up to go on a "hunt" on a night out. 

Then with any luck, at some point you meet someone  and during the first few months it is all about reinsuring you are making a good impression, in other words: self - marketing. Please insert massive yawn here. 

Plus. I don't do games. Don't know how to play them. I find them childish.
Anyway... my friends are volunteering for renewing my closet, my looks and even my attitude...  cause it seems like that is the secret to success... (rolling eyes). I feel a little bit like their experimenting doll. (Mind I will play along and I deeply appreciate their motivation).

Here is my self defense quote (I was watching the film and I thought hey! there you go bitches! lol)


My personal opinion of the matter is that first, you need to feel good in your own skin, go with the flow and things will fall in to the right place. Make up or no make up. Straightened hair or not. Mini skirt or not. High heels or not.

But then again, I just might be really lazy. 

Another advice I have gotten is from the famous mexican diva:


Being as it may be, there a few things to work on for the next couple of weeks: setting up divorce agreement, (and all the documents involved), actually getting divorced officially; heal old and new wounds and set up new projects for the future.  Kind of hard times that I don't particularly look forward to but they are necessary in order to move on to a brighter, safer, healthier and better tomorrow for my little one and myself. 

Wish me luck!! 






Sunday, 12 April 2015

Single living week 4: God squeezes but doesn't strangle!

So I am back to work :(

And I don't feel motivated at all for anything. I don't even feel like bothering. I guess it is only natural giving the fact that depression mode is on (as part of the grieving process).  It sucks big time!

I am closing this school period so I have tons to work and then 2 weeks of non pay "out of work" status. I have no idea on what conditions my contract will be renewed.  There are so many things I still need for the house (fridge, bed, a place to sit, a place to put my stuff in, so its not laying around in boxes..) but need to be careful with money as my little one and I won't have any $$$ resources soon. The ex has stated his intentions to provide child care but a month later ... I see no evidence of his words... (I am not surprised).

There is a saying in Mexico: "Dios aprieta pero no ahorca" (God squeezes but he doesn't strangle)... well... I either must be pretty tough or some miracle will happen soon. Maybe I could sell my engagement ring for house bills.. I mean, there is no sentimental value of it anymore and it is kind of an emergency. 

In other happier news, last weekend was my dad's 70th birthday. We all had a blast. We went out to eat with his brother's family who are really wonderful people. They took us out and spoiled us to bits. My little one idolizes his grandad. 



Then later on, we followed their tradition of easter egg hunting. It was a first time for little G, so he was happy to re - organise the eggs not knowing there were in fact chocolates! His cousins were happy to explain. And I have to say it.. they are great kids! So sharing, so helpful... 






Thank you auntie C for the pics! Thank you auntie A for the chocolates!
Thank you all for the great weekend out!

Tuesday, 7 April 2015

Single Living week 3: The truth will set you free.




One week off and still don't feel like enough.  Little G and I stayed busy everyday, we are very lucky to count with great family and friends.  We went out for play dates, to swim, out of the city and to oh so many different places! (No wonder why I am still tired.. exhausted...).

My little one had a blast! I had never seen him so excited. He absolutely loves his cousins. And even though there is a gap in age., they just seem to magically connect and understand each other. It is incredible how I was just looking at them (I mean, mine doesn't really speak) and they create games, go from one thing to the next and if they are not giggling they are laughing to the point of almost peeing themselves. Luckily mine, still wears a diaper for that :P


My little tomatito (red tomato).
In other news. I am still going counselling. The therapy and advice I have gotten to overcome the moments of anger (as a natural part of grieving) are pretty cool.  
There are five stages of grieving: isolation, anger, depression, guilt, acceptance.
This week it has been more going towards depression. Mind, it doesn't mean I have moved on a stage. It is a process of different emotions.

There are many things my heart just can't seem to understand (even though it can be pretty simple for the mind) and although Mr. Time will make sense one day of it all, for now, its messy.

I was educated in my family, as part of a tradition, under the philosophy of a jesuit formation and went to their schools. 

The motto of the jesuits has always been:



 "What a load of balls right??" Everybody knows that if anything, truth will get you in trouble: jail or 2 metres underground. History can relate and well nowadays, is not that different. 

None the less, I have recently come across it but put differently to me. It actually makes sense now. It is not the "truth" that will set you free, it is the ultimate truth that will set you free. Not what you think you know, it is what your heart knows. It is IT. But knowing the truth is not an easy task and it can easily be mixed up with your ego's desires and your own reasoning.  Cause that is how we have been socially pre - disposed. The truth is not something you can think, is something you feel and brings you nothing but peace; not anxiety not sadness.

Your ego wants to be right, needs to be massaged regularly, admired publicly, builds up stories to live by; stories you tell yourself of what life is and what you are, it searches for definitions. 
Your ego needs to be constantly bettering itself, will always want more and at the end of the road: it leads you straight into misery. (Here is why all buddhist try to eliminate all desires). 
Your ego will bring you equal shares of joy and suffering as a natural balanced state. But will never bring true happiness. 

The truth in your heart is that you are your beautiful self. It is what it is.

The state of fulfillment can only exist when you reach the truth. The one your heart lives by and lays in the right here, right now. The ultimate truth brings you peace and sets you free. 
Whatever life brings you, one thing will remain: the truth. And if you live by it, there will be no suffering, no hurting. It is how this life is meant to be lived. In total surrender of the truth.

Of course our brains and emotions will want to make things confusing. Myself I am in that process. I wish I could find answers to what I feel are very "reasonable" questions and I need to seek for that silence to just let it be (and to quiet my brain).

The sh*t I have recently been through I know I would have never had done to anyone; so then I am finding it hard to understand why for some others they carry on in life proudly of the damage they cause to people. It is just a matter (or so it feels) of competition where in order for them to win, someone has to loose; just like the person who criticises others to smoothly direct the speech on how good they are.

I am struggling to see what is the point on following your life on what the world recognises as values. Does it really make a difference? What is the point on being "the nicest", good hearted person?  Betrayal is a bitter drink. 

Should I have known better? I feel like I owe that little, neglected warm on my gut some flowers and an "Im sorry" card and even then, an apology doesn't really cut it. But what can you do when someone asks you to trust them? It is incredibly hurtful to realise how much you really meant to someone when without batting an eye everything that was said, done and requested of you is destroyed.

Words and values.. do they really have a leg to stand on? Or is it just a character thing? Either you got it or you don't? I've always had the feeling that I am a little old fashion. Maybe is all the books I read (not the Walt Disney films I've watched) where I do believe in heroes, in people sticking to what they believe in, standing for what they say, making a difference in their lives and everybody around them. 

Probably a product of my own fears, (particularly death) but since a very young age I made that commitment to myself: If you only live once, make it an outstanding one: it may not be the easiest road but at least I wanted to leave this world knowing that I had left something better behind. Is that too idealistic? Am I setting myself up to something that is absolutely pointless?

Any input will be greatly appreciated it. 








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